How to Make Anal Sex Not Hurt in 5 Pain-Free Steps

How to make anal sex not hurt

Anal sex should not hurt.  Quite the opposite – anal sex should feel great! For both men and women, if done right anal sex can be some of the best sex you will ever have.  The first step is learning how to make anal sex not hurt, and instead, feel great!

Although pain seems like an inevitable side effect, there are many things you can do to take the pain away and improve your sex.  With a little practice and commitment, all of your pain and discomfort can be a thing of the past.

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How to Make Anal Sex Not Hurt

Now you might be thinking – how can something as strange and awkward and anal actually feel good?  

For both men and women alike the anal wall has sensitive nerve endings that for the same reason anal sex may feel so painful, are also responsible for making it feel great.  If you take away one thing, and one thing at all from the article it is that anal sex should not hurt!

To get started, first and foremost you need to…

Relax Before Having Sex

How to make Anal Sex Not Hurt

Before having sex make sure that you are in the right state of mind and that both your mind and body are relaxed.  It sounds impossible at first right?  How is something that big supposed to fit all the way in there?!?

The key is to not worry and enjoy the experience.  This means you should try different activities to get into the mood and put your mind at ease.

Things like a long massage to loosen up your muscles. take it easy and really focus on your breathing.  Body massages are not only a great way to relieve your nerves but at the same time, spice up the atmosphere.

Another great tip is to share a nice warm bath together. This can also be a great way to calm your nerves and relax your muscles.

Anal Sex Foreplay – Rimming

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Rimming although not for everyone is probably the best way to loosen up and as long as you put in the extra effort on hygiene it can also be a lot of fun.

But remember, There point here is to only do what YOU are comfortable with.  You and always you should your first priority whenever trying something new.

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Lube Up for Smoother Anal Sex

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I have mentioned this many times in past articles, but using lube is absolutely essential when you are trying anything anal.  

I cannot stress enough the importance of investing in some good lube designed for anal sex.

Believe me – you will thank me later.

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This is because having the right lube can make all the difference between a great first experience, and a painful one.

Luckily there are quite a few great picks for products designed specifically for those on the receiving end.  

Lubes like Pjur Analyze Me have hybrid relaxants included to help get things started.


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These are just a few, but you can read a more in-depth guide to picking the best anal lube here.

Stretch Out Before Anal Sex

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You know what they say – practice makes perfect.  

If you are especially nervous and want to try first on your own (which I highly recommend) then it is a good idea to try some anal activities on your free time before the real thing.


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Anal dilator sets are a great way to get used to the sensation of anal sex but also get you a bit more ready for the real thing.  

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They typically come in sets of three, two being smaller, gradually working up to a more realistic size.  This will help you move at your own pace, but also let you start out with a size that is a little bit more manageable.

Use an Anal Relaxant to Make Anal Sex Not Hurt

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Let’s face it, for some of us it doesn’t matter how often we practice, or the number of steps we take to avoid pain.  There are some people who are just tighter than others. 

That’s when an anal relaxant really comes in handy.  Relaxants typically come in the form of a gel and are applied 10 minutes before sex.

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These relaxants can be very useful for people who have problems with pain or have had anal fissures in the past.   It makes entry a lot easier and can make the difference between a painful and satisfying bottoming experience.

Practice With a Toy on Your Own


If you really want to know how to make anal sex not hurt, then you will need to practice and be patient.

Like anything, it may be difficult at first, but the more you keep at it, the easier, and more comfortable, anal sex will become.

Anal Sex Starter Kit

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For everything you need to practice and stretch out on your own, you can try the anal sex starter kit. It comes with all the supplies you need to stretch out at your own pace.

3 Plug Silicone Anal Trainer Kit
2 Cock Rings
2 Lube Injectors
Anal Enema (90ml)
Pjur Analyse Me Lube (100ml)
Toy Cleaner (100ml)

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Anal Sex Starter Kit

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It took me years to learn How to Make Anal Sex Not Hurt, but every some experimenting, patience and experience, sex is better than ever!

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If you have any questions or would rather ask us directly feel free to email us at [email protected] or write them down in the comments below!

Those are our tips on how to make anal sex not hurt. Do you have any advice of your own? Share them in the comments below.

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