Sometimes Shit Happens: Dealing With Those Anal Sex Awkward Moments

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No matter how hard you try, shit is a fact of life, especially if you are having anal sex .  As much as we would like to pretend this kind of thing doesn’t happen, it does.  Sometimes I feel like no matter how careful I am, or how often I wash, or prepare, or pray – surprises happen.

Imagine after some fantastic sex, you pull out and there is a piece of poop waving hello off the top of your dick.  Yes, it sucks – but a lot of having sex is about is learning how to deal with these kinds of awkward, messy situations because let’s face it, sex is fucking dirty no matter what hole you use and the best you can do is to learn how to play it cool, and the use an awkward experience to better prepare for the next time.

So how exactly can you avoid these messy citations?  Well, that’s what I am here to talk about.

What you can do:

Go to the Bathroom Early

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As a rule, I try to use the bathroom at least an hour or two before having sex.  This will give you plenty of time to clean things out naturally and ensure that you aren’t in a rush.  Take your time, go slowly, and be patient to be sure that you have truly gotten that shit out!

Use an Enema

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Most of the time going to the bathroom naturally is enough to get prepared.  If though you are extra worried and want to be super careful than using an enema is the best way to finish the job.  This will flush out anything that might still be lingering inside, and after a good 2 or 3 flushes out should be good to know.

If you want a more in-depth explanation be sure to check out How to Use and Anal Enema.

Inspect Things Yourself

If you are still worried that things aren’t all spick and span,  then stick a finger up there and test things out for yourself!  Yes, it sounds weird, but it’s a whole lot awkward than having to deal with a poop dick after.

Just put some lube on your finger, slide it in slowly, all the way in and feel around.  Are you truly cleaned up?  You should know pretty quickly.  If everything comes out clean then you have done well.

Eat Less

This is more for the extreme cases, but if I am trying to make a first impression and I know I have sex coming up on a big day I will try my best to eat less the day before.  Logic says that what goes in has to come out, so by eating less you give your body more time to naturally clean itself out.

Wear a Condom

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Besides the fact that condoms are absolutely necessary if you plan to have safer sex, they are also a godsend in terms of hygiene.  You will have a lot less to worry about and mush less on your mind knowing you have a latex barrier on to guard against any unwanted surprises.

The Best Anal Condoms

Read More: The Best Anal Condoms



Don’t Be Afraid to Say No

This one seems pretty straightforward, but if you aren’t properly prepared for sex, or simply don’t feel comfortable, then just say no.  For your own self-respect, on top of the fact that having sex without being properly prepared beforehand can be messy and often times more painful, you should only have sex unless you are truly ready for it!

Keep a Positive Mind

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Like I mentioned in the beginning of this article no matter how hard you try, sometimes shit still happens, and in this case, the best thing you can do (whether you are top or bottom) is to accept it, get cleaned up, and not let it ruin the experience!

All-in-all the most important thing you can do is to prepare yourself and keep a positive state-of-mind.  The whole poop factor can be a scary thing at first, but it is important to not let it get the best of you.  Sex should be sexy, romantic and most of all fun! So first and foremost, stay positive! 


Mr. Q

I'm Mr. Q. I started MaleQ with the goal of answering the questions about sex, dating and relationships for people just getting stated. If you have a question, suggestion, or are just looking to chat, feel free to message us at: [email protected], check out our YouTube page or Facebook.

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