Dating Across Borders – 5 Tips to Having An International Boyfriend
I have had a few relationships with people from other countries before, and each experience always brought new perspectives into my dating life and opened my horizon to things I might not have ever encountered otherwise. That is the thrill of dating across borders, and that is what makes it so exciting and special.
Of course, like any other relationship, there are bound to be some flaws and problems you run into along the way, especially when we are talking about two people from two different sides of the world. You will have a different sense of values, and overall maybe different life goals entirely. But dating across borders can be a whole lot of great too, and you just might find out that despite all of the difference and challenges, you should always remember that we really aren’t all that different, no matter where you come from.
Tips to Having An International Boyfriend
So when you are dating someone from other countries, what are the things to expect? Here are the best and the worst things about having an international boyfriend.
The Language Barrier
Unless you come from the same part of the world, chances are if you are dating someone from another country you might be communicating in one or both of your second languages. You might use his language, or he might use yours – you might both even use a language second to talk to each other!
Personally, language has always come naturally to me (I am even writing this article in my second language!). However, since English isn’t the language I was born with, there are definitely times that I have wanted to express something, yet couldn’t quite find the right way to get it out. And I can tell you right off the bag, it sucks.
Not to mention when you want to express your emotions, have a serious conversation, or really express your personality the best way you can. Having a language barrier can be a test!
When I asked people around me, most of my friends are afraid to date someone from a different country for this reason alone.
Yet if you are willing to, it’s the concept of embracing new things, including language that makes these kinds of relationships so unique.
And if in the end, you are patient, diligent, and truly put in the effort to understand each other then you may find a relationship that is stronger than you could have found otherwise!
If you are dating someone from an entirely different environment, then you have to get rid of any stereotypical assumptions you might have beforehand! No matter who you meet in life you should always treat someone as an individual because as easy as it is to follow stereotypes, they are very often not the truth.
Not all Asians come from strict, conservative families, not all American enjoy eating greasy food. That being said, you should always be open-minded of what’s to come and get to know people as people, not as a label.
Some things may be quite different than what you expect, and that leads to my next point.
Be Open to Surprises
From my own experience, dating across borders means that you have to be able and willing to deal with surprises. This includes things like unexpected romantic moves, cultural differences, or simple lifestyles and habits.
He might be super into PDA, or not at all. He may want to listen to different types of music then you are used to. He might shower at a different time of the day or even put ketchup on his toast!
The point to remember is that accepting each other for who you both are is the key to any and all healthy relationships.
And who knows, you might learn more than you imagine, change your own habits, or learn to understand things that you wouldn’t have even bothered to know, and that’s definitely one of the perks of dating internationally.
If you haven’t seen it already, we have an amazing article that walks you through the ins and outs of dating long distance, so if you haven’t already I really suggest you to give it a read.
And when talking about international dating it’s hard to forget this one. Yes, maybe you both met in the same place but chances are, someone will have to go back home eventually be it a few weeks for the holidays, or even a few years. Either way, chances are you will both have to deal with some extended periods apart at some point.
This kind of distance will really tell how well you two fit together. It can test your patience, your communication and the strength of your relationship. But distance also has a plus side! If you can stick out the hard times, chances are you might find yourself visiting a new country!
Have Fun and Learn From Your Experience
If there is one thing that dating across the border has taught me, it’s how to be more open to challenges the world has to offer. My advice is to use this opportunity to gain a new perspective and learn more about yourself, and somebody else! It may take time, and things might be more difficult than you are used to, but in my experience, I learned to treat my partner as an equal and to look into his angle.
What are your thoughts on this topic? Tell us your opinion and experience in the comment section below. We would love to know all your stories!